We’ve all felt the pressure to be perfect parents, to be the perfect husband or the perfect wife, to have the perfect body, to be the perfect boss or employee. The one who always remembers birthdays and hosts holidays, the one who organizes the family calendar and enrolls our kids in after-school classes, who befriends the other moms and sets up play dates, the one who gets all her professional work or volunteer projects done on time or ahead of schedule without missing a beat or ever looking frazzled. Well, news flash here–and this should come as no surprise–but this person only exists in our imaginations! NO ONE is perfect! No one has everything together ALL of the time.
We’ve all seen those people who appear to have it under control, who seem to have figured out how to live their lives in an easy, effortless way. The people who always look put together and seem so self-assured. I bet if you asked this person you admire if they always feel calm, if they always have it all together, this person would smile and tell you that they have good days and bad days just like everyone else. That they sometimes feel overwhelmed. That on some days their patience runs short. That their life is as much of a work in progress as yours.
Striving for perfection should not be our goal and we certainly don’t want to pass on this trait to our children. Good enough really is good enough and often times, it is more than enough! Perfectionism leads to paralysis, to creative blocks, to mental and physical exhaustion, to stress and certainly to less JOY. Perfectionism is rooted in fear—the fear of making a mistake, the fear of failure and perhaps even the fear of success.
So, why not CHOOSE to show yourself some kindness and empathy, to encourage yourself the way you would encourage a friend, to ignore the critical voice in your head and to instead, welcome the POSITIVE voice of approval and love.